Crossroads

Seeing the Crossroad

Everyday, when I walk my dog in the morning, we come to a four-way intersection. It’s inside my apartment complex, so there’s no traffic and no reason to stop. But everyday, she stops and looks in all four directions. As if going one way would be a better a choice than another. And most days, she chooses to go the same way, straight ahead.

In my life, there have been obvious crossroads, getting married, having children, etc. But there were many more “crossroads,” that didn’t seem that obvious. Even today, they happen all the time. I am just largely unaware of their importance to my life. And I think this is good.

How Important Is This Crossroad?

There’s a lot of pressure growing up. We’re told, if we go to this school, we’ll be successful. If we don’t get into the ‘best’ college… our lives will be “______” (you fill in the blank.) If you don’t study, X or Y or Z… you’ll never be ‘successful.’ To be ‘successful’, you need to do the ‘right’ things. Well, I call bullsh*t.

I believe that most of us, make the best choices we can, at any given moment. Our decision may have unintended consequences, but the choice we make, is ours. The lessons we learn from any given decision/crossroad, makes us who we are. We all make a lot of mistakes, but one choice at one crossroad, doesn’t define our entire life. So don’t believe those who tell you… you must do this or that. If you believe there’s a different path that is right for you, I hope you’ll take it. It may not turn out the way you thought, but it will be yours.

Moving Forward

If you’ve made choices that, in hindsight, seem unwise or downright stupid (and who hasn’t?), then you’re just like the rest of us. The problem isn’t with the choices we made yesterday, it’s with the negative self-talk and inability to ask for help today, that make us lonely, frustrated and angry.

For today, I’m going to stop being mad at myself for my choices, and be as compassionate to myself as I am to others. It’s this day and the choices I make today that count. Take a deep breath, stop and see the beauty in nature, and in yourself. I’m with you.