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Should I Stay or Should I Go?

“If you’re ever presented with an opportunity to move to another place, take it. Whenever I’ve moved somewhere, I tell myself, I already know what it was like where I was and if after a year I don’t like it I can always go back because I know that place is going to be there. So pack your shit in a truck and move.  Sometimes you just need to be in a place where you don’t know anyone and just go figure out your life.” Jenna Marbles

I Moved and Moved and Moved…

I moved 3 times in high school. It was awful. But it taught me some survival skills that are useful today. When I was in my 20’s, I moved over 10 times. Then I lived in one place for 35 years. After my kids were out of the house, I sold our family home. Since then, I have moved 5 times. No, I don’t like moving… this is just how my life turned out. But for this last big move I made, I used Jenna’s words as inspiration.

What I Learned From This Move

Let’s be clear, if you end up staying in one place your whole life, it’s all good. There are no rules for how you ought to live your life. But if you feel like you want to experience a new place, I hope you’ll try it. The fears you might have about being lonely and off-center are justified, it can be hard. But it also can be exciting, interesting and enriching.

If trying new experiences is like trying on new clothes (to see how they fit), then moving is like getting a new wardrobe. No one has preconceived ideas about who you are (except you!) No one knows you’re shy, or feel awkward. Chances are very good most of the people you meet feel the same way.

From each move, I learned much more about myself; what I want in my life, what I’m made of, and what I need.

What I Learned From Moving

I’m strong. People are good. I belong everywhere. I need to ask for help. I can’t do it alone. I don’t have to. It’s good when I trust myself. I get to try new things without anyone watching to tell me I’m doing it wrong. I can be anything. It’s good to try new things. I am loved, by me.

Image credit: Wassup?

4 Responses
  • Irana van Oostrum
    December 18, 2017

    Debbi, I wanted to honestly tell you how much I’m loving these posts from you. thank you for sharing your points of view. the more I read the more I recognize myself in your certain perpectives on not only life but on yourself as well. I have moved 5 times in my life. have lived in another country (Norway) for 8 years, came back, but strongly feel the urge to go back again and planning on doing so in 2018. I am convinced that it’s healthy for us as human beings to have to adjust to new situations, places and people. to confront the struggle of having to find your place and finding yourself along the way. I most certainly wouldn’t have been the person I am today if it weren’t for the fact that my parents took risks. it’s one of the more important things I’ve learned from them.

  • Deborah
    December 18, 2017

    Irana, I am so happy to hear from you. I’m excited to follow your adventure and stand beside you as the risks are taken and your wisdom grows. Sending love, D

  • Katherine Reeves
    December 19, 2017

    You are braver than I Machine! I have moved roughly 6 times in the past 12 years while in college and beyond, but the majority of them have been within the same town. If it weren’t for the fact that I knew I wa a moving somewhere “better” or nicer (and local), then I would have been terrified.
    My last move was to a neighboring town with my husband (3 months ago), and the only reason this was ok was because I’ve driven through this town almost daily for work for the past 5 years. If I didn’t have him, I don’t know that I’d have been able to do it.

    However, on the flip side we’ve talked about moving far away from our home to another state and even other countries. Sometimes the idea and dream of moving opens so many doors that you didn’t expect to have. Maybe one day we’ll take the leap. For now, we’ll stay in California ?.

  • Deborah
    December 20, 2017

    Katherine, it doesn’t matter whether you ever move far away. You just need to do what is right for you. You’ll know! Thanks for your comment, DM

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