All my life I’ve been torn between caring and not caring.
On the one hand, I care deeply about other people. I grew up in a difficult family (alcoholics) and so much of what I ‘care’ about has to do with people who have ‘less than.’ I make a conscious effort to be helpful and kind.
On the other hand, I have never really cared about what people think about my choices. Because I grew up quickly and had a lot of responsibility, I learned to be independent. When my choices conflict with what other people think they should be, it causes them discomfort and then they judge me. They are afraid that my ‘differentness’ might rub off on them or challenge their own ideas.
A lot of decisions are made because people are so afraid of what other people will say or think. OR what we imagine they might say or think. The more time we spend thinking about what others think, the less time we spend doing cool, fun or interesting stuff, that we want to do.
This morning I heard an old favorite on the radio. “Make Your Own Kind of Music” by Mama Cass Elliott
There’s only one song worth singing
They may try and sell ya
Cause it hangs them up
To see someone like you
Sing your own special song
Make your own kind music
Even if nobody else sings along
Jay
January 31, 2015It isn’t the mountains ahead to climb that wear you out; it’s the pebble in your shoe.
Muhammad Ali
Carl Hoffman
February 2, 2015You know I am a “book off the shelf” kind of guy and this post reminds me of the premise of the book I finished last night entitled, “Trying Not To Try: The Art of Science and Spontaneity,” by Edward Slingerland. While I did not especially like the book it could have been an excellent magazine article. One sentence reads, “In fact, actually thinking about walking while trying to walk is a great way to trip.” His idea is basically to get your emotions and mind working together. When that happens you will get favorable attention because you naturally have your act together. Being consciously trying to get public approval is destined to fail.